Crocs + Uggs = WTF Nightmare Boots
What if two of the most annoying things in the world decided to combine forces and create a hybrid? Nope, I'm not talking about Bronx Mowgli. I'm talking about these hideous Croc-Ugg Frankenstein monster boots:
These boots are more than the sum of their parts-- they're somehow even more horrible than the footwear that spawned them.
What's to stop other annoying fashion trends from procreating? What if leggings and pre-ripped jeans were to jump into bed together? Or headbands and shutter shades? I shudder to think of the trend-babies that could be born.
2008-12-31 11:03:45 UTC
Yé-yé Profile: Sylvie Vartan
La Plus Belle Pour Aller DanserAmazing hair, slight case of dead-eyes.
2:35 du bonheurWeird guy appears!
Par Amour, Par Pitié (1967)Pretty song.
Dans tes bras ( je veux l'oublier )Nice pantsuit. Why is the guy holding her head like that? It's bothersome.
Je voudrais être un garçonThe pantsuit returns! 1:31 nice statue.
Comme Un Garcon la panne d'essenceFailure of gas? She hasn't yet adopted her signature breathy sexpot style.
A Plein Coeur (1964)With her future husband, Johnny Hallyday, the French Elvis.
2008-12-30 17:41:54 UTC
France Gall: Schlager Girl?
France Gall is most famous for the French yé-yé songs from the first couple of years of her career. Her popularity in France quickly began to wane though after the controversy surrounding the Gainsbourg-penned, double entendre-laced ode to licking lollipops, "Les Sucettes." It seemed that everything she sung afterwards would be suspected of being inappropriately sexual. Indeed, it was even suggested that her musical tribute to JFK ("Bonsoir John John") might really be a necrophiliac fantasy!
Je suis une nécrophile.
As these accusations were tarnishing her reputation in her native France, Gall began to enjoy a great deal of success in Germany. She regularly recorded there from 1966-1972. The songs are wonderful. Unfortunately, I could only find a few videos of actual performances. Behold the power of France Gall. She can even make German sound adorable.
- Der Computer Nr 3 (1968)
- Ali Baba Und Die 40 Räuber (1971)
- Ein Bisschen Goethe, Ein Bisschen Bonaparte (1969)
I think this song is about computer dating. What the hell is wrong with the audience?! She's putting her heart and soul into her little France dance and they're practically comatose. And some of them look angry!
Another sedate audience. France turns her cute powers on high, but the Germans will not be moved! Also, what's up with the cameraman's fixation on France's footwear at about the 1:00 mark?
This translates to "A little bit Goethe, a little bit Bonaparte." France dresses like a 5-yr-old in a blatant attempt to melt the Germans' icy hearts.
Do the France dance!
2008-12-29 18:23:36 UTC
Bread Dough Secrets
I've been baking all of my own bread lately with very mixed results. The no-knead bread turns out like a dream every single time, no matter what. Sometimes I add a couple tablespoons of yogurt and some oregano or a pour of olive oil and some basil, and it always has excellent texture and a perfect crackly crust. It's the most idiot-proof bread recipe I've ever encountered. But it takes about 24 hours to make so I've been searching for other options and the few french bread recipes I've tried have yielded super dense, heavy loaves. I figured I must be doing something wrong so I consulted Google and found my exact same query had been discussed on Chowhound. The magic dough words are smooth and elastic. I knew my dough wasn't smooth or elastic, I just wasn't sure what to do about it. While the advice varied, I'm probably adding too much flour to the dough. So, hopefully adding less flour will solve the problem.
I also wanted to share what one commenter had to say about bread dough: "I was told by a master bread baker that the equivalent touch for smooth and elastic is ... the feel of a woman's breast." This reminds me of the "bag of sand" joke from The 40 Year Old Virgin. Has this "master baker" ever actually touched a woman's breast?! Boobs should not be elastic. You should not be able to stretch them out really really thin and then ball them up again. If you try to do that to a real live woman's breast, she will not be happy. And if you are looking for that quality in a boob, you are weird.
2008-12-28 12:10:21 UTC
Chocolate
Chocolate is the latest film from Prachya Pinkaew, the director of the Tony Jaa vehicles Ong-Bak: Muay Thai Warrior and Tom-Yum-Goong (aka The Protector). It was released almost a year ago in Thailand and it's due out on region 1 DVD on February 10, 2009. Chocolate features a new Muay Thai warrior making her debut, 24 year old Yanin "Jeeja" Vismistananda. Jeeja stars as Zen, an autistic savant who learns martial arts from watching Bruce Lee and Tony Jaa films and from observing the students practicing at a nearby Muay Thai school. She's like Rain Man but with incredible fighting skills. She eventually needs to employ these skills to collect the debts that are owed her cancer-stricken mother, who used to be a loan shark for some Thai gangsters until she had to go into hiding because of an affair she had with a yakuza. I think. I'm a little fuzzy on some of the plot details because the bootleg version I saw had the absolute worst subtitling I've ever seen. But none of that really matters. A tiny autistic girl beats the hell out of hundreds of men in increasingly imaginative ways. The plot is irrelevant. And seriously, she is tiny. She looks to be about 14 which makes the fight scenes even more satisfying. I won't divulge any more details. Just go watch the trailer.
2008-12-27 22:00:39 UTC