Basil Pesto and Authenticity
There is only one reason that I grow basil in the summer: to make gallons of that delicious green goo known as pesto. I always plan on freezing pesto or making enough to give to friends, but I never do. I always eat it all, wiping every last bit up with baguette. (I never put pesto on pasta or pizza. It's perfect just the way it is, slathered on hunks of sourdough.) Give me a bucket of pesto and a loaf of bread and watch me transform into a hedonism-bot. It’s not pretty. I don’t think I've ever encountered more pesto than I can actually eat. It doesn't matter how much pesto there is, I'll eat it. I may end up feeling sick afterwards and cursing its name, but I never stay angry for very long. I can't blame the pesto.
Happily, it’s the simplest thing in the world to make.
Ingredients:
- 2-3 c fresh basil leaves
- 1/4 - 1/2 c pine nuts (or walnuts)
- 1/4 - 1/2 c grated parmesan
- 2 T garlic
- Olive oil
Directions:
Throw everything but the oil into a food processor and pulverize it. Add oil gradually until it reaches your desired consistency. I probably use about half a cup, but I like it oily.
I've seen recipes for pesto that claim you must use a mortar and pestle to make real "authentic" pesto. First of all, anyone making claims as to the authenticity of their food is full of shit. How does one determine the authenticity of something? What makes a dish authentic? For example, should we consider ceviche an authentic South American dish even though it calls for non-indigenous citrus fruits that were introduced by the conquistadores? Cultures have been trading with each other and influencing each other since forever! Authenticity implies some kind of purity. Well, there’s no such thing as purity in the cultural context so can anything really be considered truly authentic?
Assuming authenticity is somehow determinable, why is it always considered a good thing? People use the word authentic like it’s synonymous with wonderful. This Jellie of Fyshe is supposedly an authentic medieval recipe. Does that make the seafood jello mold any more palatable? And isn’t raw meat like really authentic, like maybe the most authentic food of all?
It seems that pesto is the past participle of the verb pestare, or to crush, so the purists advise you to take that literally. Using a food processor is definitely not how you make authentic pesto. But if you’re going to crush your pesto with a pestle for authenticity’s sake, why not authenticize the whole frickin’ process? I mean, is it truly authentic if you don’t personally harvest the pine nuts from the pinecones, make the cheese, and press the olives?
Technology’s a good thing. I can make pesto in five minutes that tastes exactly the same as pesto that's been slowly crushed by the calloused hands of an “authentic†Italian grandmother.
2007-06-29 11:57:16 UTC
No More Cockfights
Cockfighting is now officially illegal in New Mexico. (Damn paternalistic government.) I don't know if Noah and I have any reason to move to Albuquerque now. I guess it's a good thing we're going back to Ecuador in the fall, where the cockfighting is fierce, frequent, and totally legal.
When we were there last year and told the family we were staying with that we were going to a cockfight, the patriarch told us that we would enjoy it because the cockfight "es muy bonito." I was slightly confused. Bonito means beautiful, right? Were we talking about the same thing? Two roosters clawing at each other with mini-knives strapped to their feet? The owners sticking the gallos' heads in their mouths between rounds to suck the blood off their lacerated faces? (F'real. It was totally disgusting, not to mention unsanitary.) Did he really mean to say bonito? I wouldn't exactly describe it as beautiful. (This is actually how I described it.)
If you want to see a legal cockfight without leaving the US, the only state where it hasn't been banned yet is... Louisiana.
2007-06-28 13:28:09 UTC
Sweet Symbiosis
Let's hear it for our friend the tapeworm! Not only does our parasite pal help us slim down, it turns out he might also be able to function as a contraceptive-- for both men and women. (This BBC article is five years old, but it was news to me.) But that's not all! Koichiro Fujita, a professor of environmental parasitology at the Tokyo Medical and Dental University, believes that tapeworms can also cure hay fever, asthma, and dermatitis. How can he be so sure? Because he's got three living inside him and he wouldn't have it any other way.
Unfortunately, it's illegal to sell tapeworms in the US. (Damn paternalistic government!) Luckily though, there are some simple lifestyle changes that you can make to increase your chances of befriending a tapeworm:
- Begin incorporating raw meat into your diet.
- Stop washing your hands after using the bathroom.
- Start spending more time hanging out with livestock.
Just follow these suggestions and you'll be parasitized in no time! And on your way to a better you.
2007-06-27 13:41:25 UTC
The Evolution of Sushi
Over the last couple of decades, sushi has earned a prominent place in the enormous American snackhole and the resulting increase in demand is impacting the global market for bluefin tuna. According to this story in the NY Times, we (along with the Russians, South Koreans, and Chinese) are eating so much tuna that Japan is experiencing major shortages. So what's the big deal? There's plenty of other fish in the sea, right? “It’s like America running out of steak," explains the vice-chair of Japan's sushi chef union. He really shouldn't even joke about something like that, but he made his point: Japan running out of tuna is a big frickin' deal.
Japanese sushi chefs are feeling increasing pressure to come up with alternatives to the vanishing tuna they've come to rely on. Some of the possible substitutes include smoked deer and raw horse, which is already considered a delicacy by some. It's called basashi. My Little Pony sushi? So kawaii!
Though most Americans will be repelled by the thought of pony sushi, it wasn't that long ago that the idea of eating raw fish was just as shocking. It was practically considered taboo in the US 50 years ago. In fact, the bluefin tuna that we can't seem to get enough of now, and are willing to pay through the nose for, used to be ground up for cat food because we didn't know what else to do with it (from a fascinating Vanity Fair article). That's one of the reasons Japan got so hooked on it: it was cheap and nobody else wanted it. Except America's cats, of course. So who knows how our tastes may change in 50 years? Perhaps Horseflesh Ice Cream will sound absolutely delicious.
2007-06-26 10:55:27 UTC
Sushi
Americans have fallen in love with sushi in the last couple of decades, especially so in recent years. Sushi bars have popped up everywhere and not just in the city centers. They're in airports and suburban strip malls. Nowadays, people who express disgust at the mere mention of it seem terribly old-fashioned or white trashy.
The sushi craze hasn't quite penetrated the Nascar market yet, but give it time. As it stands, it's got too healthy (and cosmopolitan) of an image for that crowd. Some clever marketer needs to make sushi seems like it's bad for you. You know, because healthy stuff is for girly girls and fags. Total market penetration would require even further Americanization of maki-zushi. Californization is not enough: the California Roll is just a little too healthy (read: gay) for your average redneck. I'm envisioning super-sized bulging rolls oozing liquid cheese and horsey sauce. Of course, they would also have to be breaded and deep-fried. It's just a matter of time before you'll be able to get your trans-fat soaked nori rolls from the drive-thru.
Sushi has very quickly earned its prominent place in the enormous American snackhole and the sudden increase in demand is impacting the global market for bluefin tuna. According to this story in the NY Times, we (along with the Russians, South Koreans, and Chinese) are eating so much tuna that Japan is experiencing major shortages. So what's the big deal? There's plenty of other fish in the sea, right? “It’s like America running out of steak," explains the vice-chair of Japan's sushi chef union. He really shouldn't even joke about something like that, but he made his point: Japan running out of tuna is a big frickin' deal.
Japanese sushi chefs are feeling increasing pressure to come up with alternatives to the vanishing tuna they've come to rely on. Some of the possible substitutes include smoked deer and raw horse, which is already considered a delicacy by some. Horse sashimi is called basashi and you can even get it in ice cream.
My Little Pony sushi? So kawaii!
Though it seems unlikely that Americans would embrace the pony sushi, it wasn't that long ago that most Americans were pretty much repelled by the idea of eating raw fish. It was practically considered taboo in the US 50 years ago. In fact, the bluefin tuna that we can't seem to get enough of now, and are willing to pay through the nose for, used to be ground up for cat food because we didn't know what else to do with it. That's one of the reasons Japan got so hooked on it: it was cheap and nobody else wanted it. Except America's cats, of course.
2007-06-26 10:35:14 UTC