The Machine Girl
Early in Noboru Iguchi's over-the-top gorefest The Machine Girl, the heroine and titular character, Ami, tells her beloved little brother that violence is never the answer. But then her brother is bullied to death by the ruthless son of a yakuza and his gang of teen thugs. And when she tries to investigate his death by questioning the parents of one of the thugs, they try to kill her. She manages to escape, but not before they batter and deep-fry her arm!
Tempura arm hurts!
From this point on, violence becomes the only answer as Ami resolves to exact sweet, bloody revenge on those responsible for her brother's death. The film is seeped in gallons of fake blood and littered with severed body parts, including her own arm which she has replaced with an eight-barrel machine gun.
Machine gun arm kills!
This movie is fun for the whole family-- if your family is into really inventive depictions of incredibly graphic violence. Its creativity is what makes The Machine Girl so entertaining. The filmmakers come up with increasingly imaginative excuses to squirt spectacular geysers of blood. It will consistently surprise, revolt, and delight you in the special way that only good gore can.
Here's the trailer. Warning: it's awesome, but there are many, many spoilers.
2008-07-31 10:29:58 UTC
Early 90s Mix Tape: Meryn Cadell
When I was compiling my Early 90s Mix Tape Staples, I somehow forgot to include "The Sweater" by Meryn Cadell. Here's the video. This song came out when I was in high school and my best friend and I loved it. We thought it was terribly clever. Mostly because she was validating some of our own observations about high school, which we thought were terribly clever. Here are some sample lyrics:
- "You're looking for the boy of your dreams who is the same boy in the dreams of all of your friends."
- "Just be yourself-- the best, cutest, quietest version of yourself. Definitely wear lip gloss."
Angel Food for Thought was one of my go-to CDs for mix tapes. The whole album was really funny.
And BTW, Meryn Cadell is a man now.
2008-07-29 20:21:09 UTC
Basil Daiquiris
While we were in the Mission, we wandered into a great little bar called Dalva. We were lured in by the shabby-chic decor and Kubrick's Lolita projecting onto the wall. The bartender was in the middle of preparing some drinks that we assumed were mojitos. We'd seen him grab a handful of leafy green stuff and mix it with some lime and sugar syrup. Upon closer inspection, we discovered the herb he'd been muddling was actually basil! I was skeptical yet intrigued. What sort of cocktail has basil in it? He called it a Basil Daiquiri and it was absolutely delicious. It never would have occurred to me but it totally makes sense. The combination of ingredients is so surprising, yet so simple. It's basically a mojito with basil instead of mint. Here's the version I came up with. Feel free to experiment. This should make 2-3 drinks.
Ingredients:
- handful of basil (maybe 20-30 leaves)
- juice from 2 limes
- 6 T sugar syrup (see instructions)
- a lot of white rum (at least 1 cup, or 5-6 shots)
- a splash of water
Instructions:
Make your syrup. It's so easy and far, far better to use for cocktails. It's a 1:1 ratio of sugar to water. Boil the water and then add the sugar. When it's all dissolved, you've got syrup. It takes minutes and costs way less than buying it pre-made. Put the basil leaves and the lime juice in a shaker and muddle it up. Add the sugar syrup, the rum, the water, and a handful of ice. Shake, shake, shake, Señora, and pour it over ice.
I was going to post a picture of the finished product, but photos of cocktails tend to be really boring. The picture I took didn't at all capture the refreshing, surprising taste of the delightful Basil Daiquiri. It deserves better. How could I do it justice? Maybe if it made a cameo appearance in The Dark Knight?
That's much better.
Or how about if it were summoned from the depths of Mr. Belvedere's subconscious?
We just might live the good life yet, huh, Mr. Belvedere?
Don't let the basil scare you off this drink. It's fantastic. I'm now inspired to experiment with some other herbs I'd never considered for use in cocktails. I think I'm gonna try something with cilantro for my next alcoholic endeavor.
2008-07-28 21:41:58 UTC
Chinatown Snacks
You'll eat your dried sweetened Spicy Baby Squid and you'll like it!
"But it's really very gross!" cried Brian.
Noah bought some squid jerky while we were in Chinatown in San Francisco, but oddly enough no one wanted any. I don't understand why they always add sugar to their dried squid products. (This has come up before.) Who thinks that's a good idea? Squid is not candy, people!
I made the mistake of buying a "Sour Plum" bubble tea. I love bubble tea and "Sour Plum" sounded like an interesting flavor. As soon as I tasted it, I remembered that "Sour Plum" is just code for "Prune." Curse my slow-wittedness! I'm sure prune juice bubble tea would be well-received by the nursing home crowd, but I wasn't too happy with it.
2008-07-28 11:28:09 UTC
Goodbye Smokes, Thanks for the Memories
Today marks one month since Noah and I quit smoking. It hasn't been too difficult. I've never been the kind of person to roll out of bed and light a cigarette. That's just gross. I usually only smoked a few cigarettes a day, unless I was in a social situation in which case I would smoke pretty much constantly. Still, sometimes I really ache for a cigarette. When I walk by someone who's smoking, I kinda want them to blow it in my face.
I really miss smoking. I'd like to make a montage of all my favorite smoking moments. Anti-smokers talk about smoking as if it's an antisocial thing, but it's actually quite the opposite. It was never deemed to be antisocial back when everyone smoked. It's just part of the stigmatization campaign. They're making it antisocial when they pass their stupid laws banning smoking from social spaces. But I made tons of friends through smoking. My best cigarette memories are filled with friends. I always liked being a smoker. Smoking is fun, kids. It really is. And this argument is really quite convincing:
Don't these guys look like John Waters and Tom Kenny?
Alas, I quit. The minute someone figures out how to circumvent the negative effects, I'll be a smoker once again. Either then, or when I turn 70, whichever comes first. For now, I'll just cling even tighter to dear sweet alcohol.
2008-07-27 19:09:24 UTC