Jem is Truly Outrageous
The latest issue of Bitch features an interesting article about Jem and the Holograms and how the show promoted feminist ideas (girl-controlled music) and conventional gender stereotypes (girls obsessed with "glamour, glitter. fashion, and fame") at the same time. I recommend the article, but you gotta see the video below. Mother of God, this is awesome. Be prepared to rock out in the girliest manner possible: Jem and the Holograms perform Le Tigre's "Deceptacon."2006-09-30 14:31:57 UTC
Little Cuties
This is one of our new friends. Isn't he frickin' adorable? Noah and I bought 8 of these little guys a couple of weeks ago. We had been talking about getting birds for a long time and we finally did it. We decided to get all males so that we wouldn't have to deal with their breeding. (Apparently they breed like crazy). The thought of dozens of tiny baby birdies was very tempting, but Noah pointed out that if we weren't extremely careful we'd probably end up with a bunch of inbred birds. That made it slightly less tempting. So we chose to go with our very own little homo-topia, like a tiny feathered Ancient Greece. Perhaps we could name them after some of the great philosopher-sodomites.
Here are two of the four typical zebras we got. We also got four whites. At first, things seemed to be going smoothly. They charmed us with their constant cheep-cheeping and hopping from perch to perch (to swing and back to perch). They always appeared to be so busy and purposeful, as if they were conducting very important business. The boys were fighting a bit, but they seemed to be pairing up and working out their hierarchy issues. Yep, things sure seemed to be going well. Boy, were we wrong.
They look sweet, don't they? Well, one day we discovered an egg in the food dish. "How could 8 li'l finch-fags make an egg?" I wondered. After much scientific research, I concluded that there must be a female in the bunch. I had believed that my birdies had formed a darling little twink community. I had been entertaining the notion of finding tiny fireman hats, construction helmets, and policeman hats so I could make cute Village People videos. I had been living a lie. Now I'd be psychologically burdened with the fact that a sweet lady finch was probably being gang-raped in my very own home.
Here are two of the rapists. Two days later, I found one of the birds lying in the food dish, dead. Not just dead, but murdered. The patriarchal little bastards were fighting over the poontang and had started actually killing each other. I read to them from my copy of the S.C.U.M. Manifesto, just to piss 'em off.
Is one of these guys the murderer? I can't prove who the murderer is, so I can't in good conscience punish them all. I mean, I don't wanna sink to their level. This is America, man, even for homicidal birdies. Now that I think about it though, they're already sentenced to life in prison, so I guess I needn't bother with a trial and all that. Let the little jerks kill each other.
2006-09-25 19:45:41 UTC
Thrift Store Dildos
So as I was walking into a potential place of employment today I realized I was wearing my "Thrift Store Dildos" jacket. For those of you who don't know, there was once a great band called the Thrift Store Dildos. They were the most rockin' band you never did see. All the girls in the band were way cooler than you. Their clothes were better than yours, they had better sex than you, and they could drink you under the table. Enter the world of the Thrift Store Dildo.
2006-09-18 19:19:34 UTC
This Is Why We're Not Planning on Reproducing
This is an old picture that still cracks me up every time I look at it. I came across it and figured I'd share it. My brother had one of those cell phones that combined pictures and he took this a couple of years ago.
2006-09-15 11:42:41 UTC
The Gallery
Well, it took me four hours to do it, but all the pictures are officially online! View the gallery here. Enjoy!
2006-09-13 22:09:35 UTC